The Replacement Killers (1998) (Show Notes)

[usr 5.0]

*WARNING : My show notes are unrated. I do not censor my thoughts while making notes.

Listen Now

The Replacement Killers (1998)

– FilmSack Edition

 

 

 

Opener:  Hey, did you guys hear! There is a big sale down at the Chinatown Sunglasses Hut! 20% off for all Triads. We all got some…you will be totally lame if you don’t go get some and oh…a black suit…and pomade.

 

Sorvino, Loco, Riff Raff, Mr. Magoo, Trejo, Sunglasses Hut, 

Twitter:    The Replacement Killers (1998) Like a free Pepsi you just kicked out of a soda machine. It’s Free PEPSI! Don’t expect a story.   Now y’all tripping. 

Stuff I Loved:

It’s Rave music!

This is very oriental.

Here is your bullet. Now I shoot you…and all of your friends.

Did you really just throw your empty gun away.

4 Asians in a speedboat. Black suits. Black Hair.

Flood lights or work lights always makes that sound in movies

Apparently there is cocaine involved.

Big drug deals always go down at the loading docks

That is what I want….Stone Cold Face Pictures Of Me At My Funeral. Staring everybody down.

All these Asians are fancy. and slick.

Is she in the Asian KKK?

ahhh…the Chinese…they sure love their fireworks.

Chow Yung Fat is in sorta white suit.

Mr. Wei? is he aware his name sounds like urine?

Must have been a big sale down at the sunglasses hut in China town.

So…the bullet marks you? but you don’t use the bullet? Do you leave it as your calling card?

Somebody is paying a debt off.

Choot Him! Chooot Him!

1st rule of sniper club…don’t watch till you start having feelings for your target.

Crying is bad for your aim. Don’t do it.

Phew…that was close…

Do you prefer Buddha with Nipples or no nipples

That face on that Buddhist when he was told he went against Mr. Wei.

That dude has Pepsi foo.

Look that old Motorola Flip Phone.

Look at those old CRTs.

Is taping a gun under your desk a good idea?

She looks totally casual sitting at that desk grabbing under it at the gun.

US Dollars!

John Lee…

Computers can fix anything.

She takes digital photos and has a darkroom. She is a lady of many talents.

I got your back if you got mine.

You just lean against me and I’ll lean right back so we don’t have to sleep with our heads in the mud.

Shotgun always wins.

She has a lot of negatives….all of the same image.

That looks like real monies.

Who uses an abacus when counting money.

Asia…mix of class and technology

Sexy Sorvino Scene

You paid $3000 dollars for that computer…also, they just shot the monitor. Get over it.

I hate this hacker shit.

What is up with the top of the scene being polarized in the city scene…I guess to block out the beautiful sky.

Eddie is dead. I think the Pepsi Mafia finally got to him.

Chow Yung Fat has been mowing down 6 and 7 people at a time before they even pull a gun. Why did he just give up when they were at Eddie’s place.

Who tosses handcuffs…what a horrible replacement killer.

Fooled ya…I got another gun.

I can see the pitch meeting now…”We’ll have a shootout at the carwash…so we can have those giant rag things bouncing around. Great for cover. Also, we just happen to have one of those mechanic scoot around thingys….in case we need to wash your undercarriage…oh behave!

Man…look at that bad ass thunderbird. Old school.

Michael Rooker is staring you down…can’t shoot him! He’s too handsome!

You can chase a car for about 5 feet…then the speed of a car is going to outpace you…by a lot.

Trejo! No way!

Time to use my special Asian powers to heal your wounds. Crack.

Do it….Do it! DOoooooo It!

So much sexual chemistry. I bet they do it.

The honor hero. No matter what he does…it is for honor…he must stick to the rules of honor. Cause…you know…the Chinese are like that…in movies.

I need a passport…can you use mine…no I can’t use yours moron!

They make passports at the Post Office. How hard can it be to march in there with a gun and get one made.

OMG…it’s Riff Raff….like so many years ago.

Family is most important. Honor Hero.

Oooooh…he wasn’t suppose to kill Rooker…he was suppose to kill the boy. Boooo…bad guys. Son for a son. Makes sense.

That is the most gang related arcade I have ever seen.

Know what doesn’t aim well….a briefcase gun.

Holy cow…Trejo just killed those pinball machines.

Man…those arcade goers got the hell out really fast…and turned off the lights….but not the power…games are still on.

They don’t care…they kill a cop…cop killers. pew pew pew

Yeah…Stevie..that is great…but I know what a shake sounds like.

You know…Stevie is kind of annoying…I’m ok with them offing this kid.

Dem is some big doors

Buddha Buddha Buddha…Buddha ev’where..

You can’t shoot a monk!

The monk is dying…like he has time to give you timelines and predictions of when Wei will find your family.

Dude…his eyes are already shut. Alan does not need you to close his eyes again.

Buddha says…everything gonna be alright…and also, magnifico!…these noodles are great.

Do you really need a passport expert to remove a photo off a current passport and put it back on.

That Rooker and son scene is really haunting John Lee.

Everybody got a gun!

No…y’all don’t be tripping.

Bounce…Bounce…my car bounces.

Now y’all tripping.

Gun runner.

He sure is in a hurry.

This has Jon Woo stank all over it.

Cartoon Festival!  Mr. Magoooooo What relationship…Magoo is watching a movie of them watching a movie and is confused by the war movie and real life. So Meta Magoo.

Trejo couldn’t hit a 7 year old with a laser sight.

Big talk…you can’t lock down the GD city

Literally…rubbing dirt on it.

Hi, I got guns in my pants…that means I will be doing some shooting.

For someone who never misses. He sure ain’t no good at shooting people in cars

the back alley guy who came out of one of the side doors is one of those Asian Actor favorites.

What can brown do for you. It can carry a screaming Sorvino right down an alley.

If you have rocket launchers…shouldn’t you start with rocket launcher.

Ohhh…we haven’t seen a good Kitchen chase through in a long time.

They used the fire escapes a lot in this movie. Would hate to be involved in a fire fight on a fire escape.

I think this movie is about guns. There is hardly a scene that doesn’t involve guns.

Is she wearing a razor blade necklace.

Trejo get’s one line. “Checkmate’ Now put my head on a turtle.

Bullet clips sure empty at convenient times.

Maybe one of the best falling scenes I have scene.

Cue the rain and atmospheric music please.

The unspoken understanding between two honor heroes.

This movie was short. Could have been shorter if they had fewer staring contests.

 

 

 

Rocky IV (1985) (Show Notes)

[usr 5.0]

*WARNING : My show notes are unrated. I do not censor my thoughts while making notes.

Listen Now

Rocky (1985)

– FilmSack Edition

 

 

 

Opener:  Look Apollo, I know you tolds me not to stop the fight right. But I gotta be honest, you not looking so good. And your wife and the other black guy…the one that’s not James Brown….they are looking at me real funny. So, Just give me a couple of pelvic thrusts on the mat and I won’t throw in the towel alright. Cause we are warriors…and we don’t give up…we get up….we don’t give up…we get up.

Alt: Dearest Comrade, I am writing you this note because during the recent boxing match between the American and Siberian Bear  Drago we exchanged quite a  lot of quote…unquote “you feel me bro” type glances… that implied perhaps that the American was winning over the hearts of our people. But after talking to other comrades they are convinced you were possibly coming onto me. That is not cool bro. We are not down with that in Communist Russia.

Rocky, Creed, Apollo, Balboa, Russian, Drago, Adrian, Pauly, Mr. T Flashback, America, Russia, Communist, 2 times, Robot, Rock Music, Flags, Snow, Christmas, On Top.

Twitter:    Rocky IV (1985) Like getting punched in the nuts. Then having a montage of you getting punched in the nuts for an hour and a half. Absoolutely

Alt: Like 

Stuff I Loved:

Are those Mylar gloves?

America vs Russia

Did you notice that the Russian Glove went down after the collision. Foreshadow!

Cool, Rocky III recap…Mr. T

Jump shot!

Could they be greasier?

Love those padded underwears.

Age jokes. “How old are you? You so old”

You ready. Absolootly.

Ring the bell….Ding…pause….ding.

This is some porno music…wonder if this was from his porno days.

Another action shot pause and a bell ring…

Corvette? Lambo?

Mom is gonna yell at you!

Friend who punchies you in the eye is the same person who gave you the hat.

So he was out sparring while his family was at home prepping for a birthday party.

Oh…my gosh….a robot. Happy Birthday Pauly…

Sony robot.

Paulie wanted a sports car…instead he gets a robot.

Geez…Rocky is spending some money.

Churches chicken commercial while apollo is in the pool. racist conspiracy.

syberian express

Rocky Robot Hotline/Pauly’s Sex Bot

Theme: You are on the top…but you are about to be old and disappear. That is why Apollo is your mentor in this movie

How vain…Watching yourselves boxing.

Feel like I am getting beat up by the theme. We get it! You are on top now…but this is your future…old man.

Are we toying with the idea that Dolph is a robot…or like a robot?

James Brown…for real!

America is a bunch of big mouths and rich and exhibistionists

All of Apollo’s Names

Kidney Punch…Rabbit Punch…are those real things?

Creed is over the hill and the Russian hasn’t fought anybody.

No matter what! Don’t stop this fight.

Didn’t catch that last “No Matter What ” with all that mouth guard and spit. “No maffa waazt”

Throw the damn towel!

That announcers mustache.

No movement by creed…except his body convulsions.

“Let him breath!”

You just know some of these camera shots are going to come back at the end. REVENGE!

Creed is out.

Those sun glasses make you look like a bug Rock

You have described everything about a great boxer…except heart….heart is all you need Rocky

Fight in Russia on Christmas day.

Reporters asking questions always heightens the anxiety.

You can’t change what you are….we are Warriors!

Apollo Montague car ride flashback. You got to remember where you came from.

No easy way out man.

Russia is cold and isolated…and KGB!

There ain’t nothing that your fancy science can do that I can’t do around the ice farms of Russia.

You got scientifically weighted machines. I got a horse and a whole lot of snow.

While you are in your fancy spotlight running training facility I am out in the snow growing my beard and my anger.

Yo Adrian! You came to Russia.

I did it. I am officially trained! Yaaaay!

Booing crowds have no effect on Balboa…on the outside….

Seems like a lot of lines are repeated in this movie…just in case you didn’t catch it the first time.

What do you think we are…nerds.

This is a non-sanctioned fight…in case you didn’t hear me…they  do not sanction it

Everybody up..time to sing the Russian thing….and Roman Candles!

The Russians are a proud people. I wonder if Russia would have launched a Cyber Attack on this movie’s release if there was a cyber to attack in 1986.

Pauly’s shirt always looks like he has been cutting meat. Pauly the butcher.

Adidas sponsors Russian boxing in the 80s?

“I must break you.”

You guys better throw in the towel if he starts killing me…

Balboa is a sloppy boxer.

I’ve watched real boxing…and it is never as exciting as this in the first round.

I don’t know how to count in Russian! What is that? 8?

“Hit the one in the middle”

This is turning into a wrestling match

This is how I play Punch-Out.

“The Russian’s Cut!” That proves he is not a robot…time to whoop his ass.

He is not a man…he is a piece of iron. A cold hard piece of iron.

Water…I don’t need water…I need vodka!

Rocky has taken so many punches to the head.

Stallone at least has to have a headache. We are seeing a lot of real hits…maybe not hard…but real contact. In a few of those close up slow-mo’s those are probably pretty intense hits.

No matter where Rocky goes. People cheer him on eventually. He don’t care.

Rocky is going to lose by points if nothing else.

Russian’s love them some Rocky. Revolt!

He’s chopping the Russian down…apparently…the Russian is tall…and you need to make it simple for us to understand…we are chopping him down.

Ahhh…The russian is crying.

I love how Adrian is all….you gonna lose…until he almost wins…and then she is all like…you gonna win!

Russian looks. You looking at me…I’m looking at you….you know what this means don’t you….yes you do.

So the American boxing champ barely beats a dude what has only won an exhibition fight. So with a little more training I think the Russian

During this fight…I seem a lot of training….how’s I felt about you…and how yous felt about me.

Rocky for president….we want change.

Standing slow clap.

Tear down your walls Russia!

Can you imagine if a Russian came here with his flag and beat up our greatest warrior that we would be like…Yay Russian! With your Russian Flag!

 

 

 

 

 

Batman (1989) (Show Notes)

[usr 5.0]

*WARNING : My show notes are unrated. I do not censor my thoughts while making notes.

Listen Now

Batman (1989)

– FilmSack Edition

 

 

 

Opener:  Maybe if everyday wasn’t foam latex rubber muscle day you could work on your hand grip.  Maybe some sticky tape for your gloves even. This has been the bane of your failures and the creation of a lot of your enemies. always slipping away from you.  That’s all gentlemen….thank you…thank you Gentlemen…that’s all.

Alt: Ahh…the batmobile…or as I like to call it…the giant cock mobile.

Alt: Don’t trust Harvey Dent! He will betray you in cloud city.

Harvey Dent is Lando, Hand strength training for Batman, Keaton has perpetual Batman Duck Lips, Video Tape Surveillance, Late 80s, Batmobile looks like a cock, a giant black..., Oooop....Ooop, Written during the 1988 writers strike, Big payday for Nicholson, Who is more obsessed - Batman or Joker?, Let's break into a safe in a plant that is doing some kind of toxic crap...what would be in that safe? mmm...Smilex....Avoid Nighttime parades hosted by insane men who have been poising all the products in town.

Twitter:   Batman (1989) Congratulations, Prince just made your movie rad.  Now, Shut up and take your Smilex.

Alt: Like attending a night parade  

Stuff I Loved:

Produced by Guber Peters….don’t guess you can combine those two names without making it sound wrong.

Hey that Batman silhouette is animated

Nod to the origin story without telling it. Great jorb.

Harvey Dent is Lando

“You look fine” – “I didn’t ask”

Film Noir baby.

200 years of Gotham

Batman sucks blood by reputation.

Hello Legs…

Man…everybody bought into this movie. All the stars!

That’s all gentlemen….thank you…thank you Gentlemen…that’s all.

I would have never cast Keaton in this movie.

I prefer the modern take on Gordon

The Judge is staring down the camera during the craps game.

Maybe it should be Bruce Vain.

Oh…video tape surveillance. I miss the blerp blerp of rewinding and fast forwarding tape.

“Shoot to kill…You know what I mean…” yes…I think that is pretty clear.

This is not good for the reputation of cops.

Maybe if I pull a bunch of these levers it will blow stuff up. Yep!

Dot matrix paper!

What kind of Money did Jack think would be in a safe at a toxic waste facility.

Nice gun shot sounds.

Ekhart…think about the future..then shoots him. I like it…I don’t get it…but I like it.

Batman….can do anything…except hold onto someone when they are slipping away from his grip.

Hey…your smoke thing didn’t work too good…I still see you going up through the ceiling.

are really long tables with people sitting at the ends really a thing for rich people?

Maybe you should have found a doctor with better tools. Better than a saw and a spoon

Bruce Wayne is really buying into this bat thing. Hanging upside down.

Wait until they get a load of me…. ooop…ooooop.

Fainting happens a lot in movies. Especially with women.

The accident affected his fashion sense….purple suits.

Man…The Joker really organised quickly…all the way down to the joy buzzer of death.

C’mon…get out of ‘ere.

Talking to a burning corpse.

Why is Batman so hung up on his parents. He should really just get over it.

Ahhh…the days of when every dude used to wear fancy hats and overcoats.

Oh no…A Mime…the most overweight mime I have ever seen!…uh oh…a whole gang of mimes.

Where were those mimes keeping a Tommy gun. I mean…a pistol…sure..

phonebook…what dat?

What the hell is that Becky the lady newscaster wearing…I mean…I’ve seen shoulder pads…but that freaking looks like she is a football player.

Jack does a “bad commercial” spot like Keaton did in Beetlejuice. This is how Tim Burton sees bad commercials.

Hehe…the newscasters with no makeup…looks like they are suffering from some disease.

There industrial city set pieces are amazing.

If you are going to get knocked out by gas…best be sure not to do it while leaning on a balcony.

Yay! Prince music. Very Arty.

Jack Nicholson may be a little too perfect for this role.

Were Jam Boxes out of style by 1989?

Everybody knows the way into a ladies pants is by insulting her work.

Ahh…the batmobile…or as I like to call it…the giant cock mobile.

Ladies always lie about their weight….everybody knows that.

Check his wallet? Where do you think he keeps that.

Getting shot in body armor always knocks you out for a convenient amount of time.

Ahh…The “sword show.” Always makes me laugh but I always suspect an Indiana Jones moment.

Does it really make sense to have a “rocket engine” engine on a car…unless you are planning on drag racing…rocket engines do not like turns.

Can you do that? Can you push a lady down and tell her to shutup.

Do we really need 10 minutes of Keaton choking on telling Vicky Vale that he is Batman.

“Never rub another man’s rhubarb.”

Was that really the best plan Bruce Wayne had? put a silver plate in your shirt and hope they shoot it and that it doesn’t go through and kill you.

2nd faint.

Moral question: Would you attend a nighttime parade of a lunatic throwing out money…

What the hell is batman doing during the poising…he’s just taking a flight…and making that face that Keaton makes with his lips. Like he just smelled a fart.

Step Down Henchman.

Bob failed me for the last time.

I feel like we are going to go for a bats in the belfry joke.

who’s crazier. batman or the joker

Gordon is like….screw it…there is a bell blocking the door. What can we do? I know…throw some lights on it,

dancing and fighting…it’s pretty much the same thing.

How strong is the Joker that he could pull batman and vicky vale over the edge at one time.

Holding on is not Joker’s strong point

A bag of laughs?

a letter from batman

a bat signal would not be very efficient

 

 

 

 

 

 

Invasion Of The Body Snatchers (1978) (Show Notes)

[usr 5.0]

*WARNING : My show notes are unrated. I do not censor my thoughts while making notes.

Listen Now

Invasion Of The Body Snatchers (1978)

– FilmSack Edition

 

 

 

Opener:  Well Todd, it looks like you proved me wrong once again. I said you couldn’t cross pod-inate a dog and a banjo playing hobo…just too much blues, slobber and booze…but here I am staring at this freaky ass thing. a dog with a human head. WTF Todd… WTF… Also, On a totally unrelated note, the guys up stairs want you dead. Skreeee

B  

Twitter:   Invasion Of The Body Snatchers (1978) You’ll always think you are watching Margot Kidder boobs but you ain’t. It’s Karen Allen. Meh Boobs.  

Alt: I want to see the movie where it’s the guys body with a dogs head and plays a FIDDLE! can dog’s play fiddles…chins!  

Stuff I Loved:

Bubbles!

Is that some sort of primordial ooooze.

Chromosomes!

And we are ready…like Dandelions on the solar winds! Fly!

Scary Music!

Spock! No way dude!

Hey…that’s earth…and it’s kind of cloudy out.

We are in you.

That is a White truck. I mean it is read…but it labeled white.

“oh nothing…just bloomin.”

Would somebody oil the swing. Or get at least spray for preacher pedophiles.

Man…NBA2K14 looked awesome in 1978

Grem – It’s a grem!

Sure glad that robe is taut. Don’t need to see his invasion snatcher.

It’s a caper…nope…rat turd!

Is that Shaq back there as the cook?

Pepperoni on that guys chest.

Yeah…let’s put the scary plant right next to the bed.

Man…alarm clocks from the 70s were loud and annoying.

“Nothing…just scooping up the glass I was hatched out of!”

Jeffery  seems preoccupied.

Banjo and the dog…fiddle

“Nevermind me..just peeping through the frosted glass door…totally not creepy.”

The White Wok…when White guys cook Chinese food.

This music sounds like midi music.

“All the alternatives…you know….like being gay.”

I think president snow has a thing for lois lane.

“That is not Coffee…” what lady…you don’t tell me what I spilled on my white shirt.

“That not my wife…” Love the language barrier.

Anybody gonna notice that the trash is weird.

Key Sutherland…what did you do to your windshield.

Did I see Cumberbatch on the bus looking at us.

What is up with the bass.

Oh yeah…the policemen will help. Hands up!

What’s so hot about that…What’s so hot about that.

Would you shut up.

Was the scar gone? nope… Worst story ever.

Fun house mirror in the book store…bar…thing…where the hell are we.

Snowden!

It’s good to see Leonard working after the Sci Fi TV series that got canceled.

Psycho Psychiatrist

Take her home Matthew.

Man what a bunch of hippies.

That was sick…seeing muddy…hairy ball undercarriage.

Rub my fat!

Would you get out of here Sadam

Giving citations for rat turds…drives around with huge traffic violation of a windshield.

Jeffery reminds me of a full size Peter Dinklage

“It’s a monster…it’s got hair all over it.”

She is freaked out about that thing…but doesn’t mind rubbing all the fat.

sorry…Elizabeth can’t come to the phone right now…she’s gestating.

It was right here.

Gee…what is in the back of that trash truck.

I don’t have any friends…get some enemies.

Rules: Has all of your memories, Can still snatch you when not connected as long as you fall asleep, Get’s pissed if you get too far away.

We got a bit of a steady cam thing going on here.

Shot on real locations.

What do you expect from a psychiatrist and ask him for help. He is going to use his only skill set. Analyze you. Dumbasses.

It’s a flower!

Wow…she called it…flower from out of space. Bam..just right there.

Screwing up our genes like our DNA. Oh yeah…and the ancient aliens who had fornicated with our monkey ancestors. You know..it’s a thing that happened.

Oh nothing…just flossing my teeth on the street.

Lambo’s Famous Chili Dogs.

Let’s take pills and sleep…

Feed me Seymour…Didn’t notice the giant pod

Those petals look like they are made of flesh…gross

Man Baby Being Birthed from Giant Fleshy Plant Pod. Grody

Seems like a lot of trouble just to copy someone.

Just hoe ’em already!

when the health inspector tells you to keep on going don’t stop…you better keep on going..don’t stop!

Could they find a location with more steps to run down.

Walk Walk Walk. RUN!

“it’s all live…it’s all naked.”

No we aren’t leaving. We are picking up somebody.

Harry the homeless guy can’t be duplicated. He’s 90% Booze

Ahhh…a couple of darts ought to take care of the pod people.

Some guys mustaches make their lips look like vajay jays. Like Sutherland

Let’s make out while being chased by the pod peole

Time passage by beaker drips. Science!

That’s how the spread the pods…they carry them around. Makes sense.

Every time a phone rings…a pod gets it’s brain.

Let’s take speed. Like 5 of them! WE ARE GOING TO WIN THIS GALACTIC WAR!

Oh goody. We just took speed…and now you are shooting us up with more drugs.

Job done. Sedative administered.

There is no need for love!

Why is Leonard wearing a bow glove? hippie.

oh cool. Leonard Nimoy is going to tell the story of his people.

Best choke hold ever with a dart to the brain.

Always escaping down the steps.

My resting bitch face has finally served me well. I’ve been walking around them for hours with my stone cold face on and they have no idea.

“hey, the lines are over there.”

The Aliens understand the concept of yellow zones are for loading and unloading only.

Let me punch this screaming old lady. RUN

I was wrong. Apparently you can clone a hobo and his dog. Not very well…but still.

Why do they need a steam roller in the pod distribution plant/greenhouse? and that dude almost walked right in front of it.

Why does the Lois Lane keep freaking screaming and showing emotions. Would just kill her.

Ships! We can take to the high seas!

Why do aliens hate our water! It’s what most of our planet is made of…why even come here!

Oh…nevermind…pod ships.

Was that coincidence or was that Axe connected to a fire alarm.

MY BABIES!

Now who’s running pod people.!

Pod people are not very good at fire prevention. No wonder they destroyed their last home.

Lois Lane is topless. So this is PG from 1978…was it released as PG? do they re-rate movies after a time? For secondary release like DVD and BluRay and the sort of thing?

Man that tongue twirly thing she did before she screamed was creepy.

Black Bart Saloon!

You could easily survive. Just by not showing emotion and not getting freaked the fuck out.

I guess sitcoms took a considerable plunge after the invasion.

pterodactyl!

Brook Adams totally looks like Margot Kidder. Thought that was who it was the whole movie.