The One

The One (2001)  87 min  Rated PG-13

A sheriff’s deputy fights an alternate universe version of himself who grows stronger with each alternate self he kills.

Director:

 James Wong

Writers:

 Glen Morgan, James Wong

Stars:

 Jet Li, Carla Gugino, Delroy Lindo |

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_One_(2001_film)

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0267804/?ref_=nv_sr_1

Opener: Wait wait wait. First, kudos on the automatic chair straps…I’m in here tight… ..zip zip zip…very cool….second…did he say penal colony? or penile colony. I just need to know how much I need to struggle here. 

He’s doing 50!

Twitter: The One- A Kind of Multiverse Ground Hog Day meets Highlander without the charm of Bill Murray or Sean Connery. But we did have Jet Li going 50. so…yeah.

Stuff I Loved:

Highlander of the multiverse

Do we need voice over and subtitles

Police bullet proof helmet. Less than bullet proof

Let the bodies hit the floor.

He’s doing 50…as long as he doesn’t slow down he shouldn’t blow up wildcat

Our muscle car has a turbo sound.

I can’t hear you…

My gun goes pew pew pew

The only person who can kick Jet Lee’s but. Is Jet Lee!!

I know it was a lot of setup…but I found the keys to this truck in the garage in the hopes you would still be standing in the carport after a long bit of banter with Jason Statham.

Multiverse travel is painful.

Victim 119 Jude Law. Promethius Universe. Doh!

Lawless…uh huh

Is that some sort of body scanner? Nope…it’s a glowing vibrator

Movie Auto Straps…Cause in the future…people don’t got time for strapping

Penal colony in the hades universe

rational murder

is that a paper clip hanging out of that’s rat’s anus. look at the size of that skroat!

Bush’s universal healthcare?

Only in Prime universe is Jet Li a good guy.

Not only are there multiple universes…but apparently all of them are just a little bit timeshifted.

This is like a Multiverse Ground Hog day.

Prime Universe. The only Universe that matters.

How come he ain’t going 50

sorry…no bad news today…maybe later.

Why is alternate universe Jet Li not have a goatee.

Already getting a feeling that this movie is going to end with a “No..It’s me!! I’m the real Jet Li…shoot him…” moment

ha! not unless he had one put in this morning in reference to penile implant.

A wedding ring and a necklace

Ha! He looks like a robot in that MRI head gear

Most aspirated x-ray tech ever. “WHAT! HOLD STILL!! I DON’T WANT TO HAVE TO DO THIS TWICE”

No! He got out…now we have to start the x-ray all over again.

Jet Li crawls funny.

My gun makes laser sounds.

shoot M.R.I. machine…it’s full of smoke

Worst security camera operator ever.

Who cocks a shotgun and then uses it to restrain someone.

One thing wrong with this theory. What if the converse happens. All of the you’s die in every universe…but one of you happens to survive. Wouldn’t that make you The One.

If you get into “The Shit”

that girl girl stuff

Answers come without thinking. Hey…am I the one? of just a no thinking smartass.

an energy…string…wave….don’t be mixing theories

can punch through a van…can’t beat up old partner

Why yes…I am going to beat you up with a couple of motorcycles.

hehe…hey….what are you guys doing…stop kicking my signs down. I know gas prices are high but c’mon!! Yeah yeah…falling prices…fuck you.

Why is it a martial arts movie wet dream to fight yourself? Equal matching for a good fight? something more metaphorical?

With all the sparks it is like “The Greatest Man Alive”

Lots of modern rock….well modern in 2001

The slow mo works in this movie.

Jet Li has the shirt wipe thinkg for his bruce lee…bring it on nose bleed.

haha…”That order is bullshit!”

He sent him to the pleasure planet. Was there not already a law there?

Fresh meat boys

Most awesome ending to a movie

They didn’t lock me in here with you…they locked you in here with me.

Penile Implant Colony! NOOOOO…

 

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