The Amityville Horror

The Amityville Horror (1979)  117 min Rated R

The Amityville Horror is a 1979 American supernatural horror film, directed by Stuart Rosenberg, based on the bestselling 1977 novel of the same name by Jay Anson. It is the first movie in the Amityville Horror franchise. A remake was produced in 2005.

The story is based on the alleged real life experiences of the Lutz family who buy a new home on 112 Ocean Avenue, in Amityville, New York, a house where a mass murder had been committed the year before. After the family move into the house, they experience a series of frightening paranormal events.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Amityville_Horror_(1979_film)

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0052564/?ref_=nv_sr_1

Opener: Little Red Room…improv….good luck

Honey, You are not going to believe what I found in the basement! and by found…I mean located with my sledgehammer….Red Room! Red Rooooom. Oh! we could put a pet bed down here…or we could keep the kids toys down here..sooo many options. Oh…what’s this…looks like a witches teet. Wait…there’s a little sign…”Doorbell To Hell.” Well hot damn!! Hello satan eww…ew… Stupid flies.

Twitter: The Amityville Horror – About an hour into this movie I suggest abandoning your popcorn & soda. Jump into your station wagon and & haul ass.

Stuff I Loved:

The Doorbell to Hell.

3:15

The “Sure” Lady.

The “Play It Cool” trope. When buying a big ticket item.

This is an extra room…aka…the kill room!

Oh man…if they see those cut scenes then the property value is going to drop!

If you see any shitty furniture you want to include…just let us know…we will include it in the price.

nothing creepy here….just sneaking around your new house blessing things. I blessed your toilet 3 times…but it still wouldn’t flush.

I hung up a few fly strips.

Hey….what’s this? it looks like….a doorbell….a doorbell to hell…..bing bong satan….hello?

Hey…you got a priest puking on your lawn

awww….dad and son matching flannel

Tits…Superman is going to be mad.

Cats are stupid

What a nice 70s Brown Cargo Van

Stupid Paper Bags

“Don’t ever grab a man’s ass when he has an axe in his hands”

A weeks worth of groceries in 2 bags. What the hell did you buy woman.

Stupid ass sneaking kids

Who the hell is Jody….and why the hell don’t she like sugar cookies…that’s unAmerican.

Father Boner.

One of those Flu things.

The Laughing nun. No one not getting sex should be laughing that much.

Priests and Nuns have superpowers that are defeated by devil house.

Can Nuns drive cars? is that allowed? I have never seen a nun drive a car…except in Sister Act

What the hell. Projectile vomiting nun

I see why they have so many kids now…bow chick a bow wow

This dog is not stealth

In a time of perms, brown vans and face braces somebody rings the doorbell to hell

I blame detroit before I blame the devil

Pink Jeep Seminary

What kind of Secular education did you have?

Sweaty priest!

We think you need to take a vacation. Wait…priests get vacations! The devil don’t take vacations!

That must be the dirtiest road ever. Those cars are filthy.

Look here carol…why don’t you take your hammock off your shoulder and go set up by some trees if the house gives you the creeps.

Thursday? I’ve been sharpening this axe since Monday

Ya Axe Wielding maniac

Mother fuc…..my hand!

Don’t sneak up on me when I am axing my way into the kid’s bathroom.

Harry…knock it off.

Do you feel that breeze.

Oh thank you for your cosmic views…now shutup!

Man he is so Christian Bale

Won’t go into the house during the day. Does go into the basement after dark. Weirdo.

It’s the passage to hell. Oh stop being so dramatic. It’s a red room.

Who turned my cross upside down!!

Prayed so hard he went blind. Of course…doubting thomas over there will say he just busted a capillary in his eyes.

Will you stop nagging at me! Teeth marks.

Oh no you didn’t….You wanted a house…you got hell house…now shutup….SLAP!

In yo face…Nun just hit 3 points.

Why do you need microfiche when you can see the future with those glasses.

I want Harry…shut the hell up…

You have a major sewage problem

.

 

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *