YeeeHaw and all that stuff y’all…and now it is time for some Theme Song Fact Checking,
I’ll try to read these lines with my fact checking voice…but I may break into song…no promises.
Alright, here we go….
“Just the good ol’ boys…”
Unproven….what we DO HAVE IS: a “Smartass” and a “Jackass” in an orange Dodge Charger
“Never meanin’ no harm…”
Hmmm…Let’s see…more attempted cop killings than an Ice-T ditty. However, since you qualified it with a “never meanin…” I guess it’s NOT technically NOT true. sooo…
“Beats all you never saw…”
What?! No..What?! NEXT
“Been in trouble with the law…”
“Since the day they was born…”
I got to tell you, this whole story seems improbable…I don’t think we need to inspect the 2nd verse..
Hey, Somebody get me the lyrics to the A-Team…I got some work to do.
Continue reading “The Dukes Of Hazzard (2005) – Filmsack Show Notes”
Oh, hi-ya…! cause…Kung Fu…
Ok….From now on, errors will be treated with zero tolerance. As an example, I point to the sloppy execution of last week’s sacking, where one unsightly error nearly set off the trolls… You know what I’m referring to don’t you… Scott?
Yeah…I know It wasn’t you, Scott
Don’t worry… I know it was Wang.
Hmmm…nothing huh…No Risk, No Reward.
Wait..The Doctor is a Timelord! …that changes everything, changes nothing.
Continue reading “Meltdown (1995) – Filmsack Show Notes”
Dear Mr. Zissou (Zee-sue), my name is Brian and I’m 11 and a half years old.
Today my mom took me to see your latest documentary. As you can imagine, I have questions. Most are related to oceanic curiosity and others, well nipples.
I couldn’t help but notice that you have nipples around the size of tic tac’s while others in your crew have nipples up to and exceeding pepperonis. Why is this? Is there an evolutionary reasoning behind this phenomenon? Also, my mother requests that “The Harlette” put on a t-shirt. I assume she is talking about the guy maxing out to dinner plate size.
Well, I think that about covers my nipple questions. Now onto more Aquatic type queries.
Do fish have nipples? My mom says no. Her boyfriend says maybe.
Also, Possibly your son, Brian for now Zee-Sue
Sept 19th, 1983
Continue reading “The Life Aquatic With Steve Zissou (2004) – Filmsack Show Notes”
Oh, hi meow.
Midnight talent agency how may I claw your eyes out today? Purr Purr.
Oh my yes, Mrs. Berry would love to be in your movie. Meow Meow
What’s that? What are her qualifications? Meow Meow.
Well she has 10’s of minutes of experience with cats. Meow. I would even go so far as to say she is a sort of cat-spert. Meow. Why I saw her just this morning looking at cat pics on the internet. Meow. It’s Caturday after all…Meow Meow.
Excellent I’ll let her know. and yes we do accept payment in the form of cans of tuna. Purr Purr.
What’s that? Sharon Stone is also casted. Hiss. Well then we are going to need some extra cans of tuna and a scratching post in Mrs. Berry’s dressing room. but no need for a shower in her trailer. She is going to mouth bathe herself after eating 8 cans of tuna on her bed. So sexy. Meow Meow
Alright, I got to go lick my butt for 2 hours. Talk to you later meow.
Continue reading “Catwoman (2004) – Filmsack Show Notes”
ummm hi, yes…My name is Brian but my friends call me the Reluctant Rhyme Slayer. Well, they never called me that before tonight…but on the drive over I heard it a lot. I guess I should have probably known something was up. Hey, thanks for signing me up for this guys and oh…by the way…nothing like Karaoke.
alright…so..I guess…umm…can I get a beat? Thanks. Ah yeah…that’s dope. Yo….MTV Raps
Oh before I start I would just like to thank my opponent here for going first and for his many honest words. While they were very hurtful…. I feel like I have a great opportunity to take those observations and make some real changes in my life. First thing Monday I’m going on a diet and getting some clothes that fit.
Also, can I just say you really took that “spitting rhymes” thing to heart. I mean I’ve never been that close to an actual rap and I was not aware how much saliva was involved. Look at me…I’m dripping over here.
Alright, so let’s get this over with…what’s that? Times up? Oh Thank God.
Continue reading “8 Mile (2002) – Filmsack Show Notes”
Hey! Young, Dumb and Full of Gum, who told you that you could park on my shooting range…where’s my whistle!
Oh…well hello there…you must be Kathryn Bigelow’s wet dream….I mean…I’m just saying it’s raining out here and you are fulfilling her artist dreams..
Anywho, it’s your turn to take aim at hilariously illustrated bad guys & gals here at the “Sunday Funnies Shooting Range” where it’s funny to shoot stuff in the head… or foot. Because everybody knows… foot trauma is the best form of humorous karma.
Ok, Sammy Idaho or Billy Arkansas or whatever your deal is…If at any point you are “looking California and feeling Minnesota” then just stop. Because at that point “break”…I have probably foreshadowed too far into the future.
C’mon…these are the 90s jokes Brah! Smile already, oh wow…4 out of 5 Dentists agree…that’s creepy…Ok…smiling…it ain’t your thing.
Now where’s my whistle! 100% sure you are going to take your shirt off in about 5 minutes if I don’t get out of here.
Continue reading “Point Break (1991) – Filmsack Show Notes”
Ok Ok. Kate is 9 now and she is losing her faith in Santa Clause and as her dad and I have to fix that.
So I’ve climbed up here on the roof of our house on Christmas Eve and I am going to shimmy…..down the chimmy…hehe…chimmy…AND deliver these age appropriate Christmas gifts for my darling Kate. Who hates Thanksgiving. Weirdo
Ok ok, Straighten up Santa…time to take inventory.
Let’s see, Weird pet from ChinaTown. Check.
Santa Clause Suit 2 sizes too big from ChristmasTown aka JC Penny. Check.
Belly full of Egg Nog from Dorry’s Tavern. Check. Check Checkity Check.
Ok, Ho ho ho, Here we go.
*Grunting and squeezing…a little too fat.
Oh, Hey little fellow what are you doing out of your box. Eww and why are you all slimy and gross.
Move you stupid thing you are gonna make me fall and break my neck. Oh no no no
The end. Merry Christmas Kate!
Continue reading “Gremlins (1984) – Filmsack Show Notes”
This week in Adventures in Filmsacking we leave the comforts of Netflix & Chill and head down to the mean streets of YouTube comments where Randy has gotten into a spot of trouble after an Internet troll who has stolen Randy’s identity (and his fancy rose colored Snachat specs (FANCY!)) and starts posting racially insensitive rhymes in the form of the blues. Bud da da da dum. No one leaves YouTube without lip-syncing the blues!
Anywho, time to hop in Ibbott’s rusted out 1997 Mazda Miata and see if we can save Randy before he has to fight a hobo for a wiener in the Apple store. Man I sure hope we don’t run into any trouble along the way!
Hey, has anyone seen my cleaning gloves? I think I saw Elisabeth Shue wearing them earlier.
Continue reading “Adventures In Babysitting (1987) – Filmsack Show Notes”
Well Alice, this is our life now. Yep, Void as far as the eye can see. except for that giant Pyramid…wait. is that The Void? I mean I was thinking of The Void as more of a location or state of mind than an actual object. Hey…do you hear that?
Hmm…I wonder what they do with our mail? I mean do they pick it up here or do we have to go someplace triangle shaped to drop it off. We still need to do Christmas cards right? I mean this doesn’t get us out of that does it? Do you hear that?
Hey Alice, Sorry about chopping you up earlier.
Seriously, you don’t hear that? Hey look…it’s Bev! Awkward!
Continue reading “The Void (2016) – Filmsack Show Notes”
Shhh…do you guys hear that? It’s the Flutey Tootey music of Danny Elfman. You know what that means dont’cha. That’s right. We are about to watch one of them military action thrillers that takes place in the jungle.
But before we do that… I’m gonna need some proof of life…maybe Scott could hold up his iPad with today’s FAKE NEWS or Maybe Randy could show me his hobbit feet and the latest WoW Release notes.
No wait! I got it….Ibbott…find a cure for Alzheimer’s while playing a cover of Van Morrison’s “I’ll be your lover, too”
Ahhh…that’s the stuff.
Also, no one talk about this movie in front of Dennis Quaid…ever…infinity
Continue reading “Proof Of Life (2000) – Filmsack Show Notes”